Flare Up

Poke, prod, push.Clench, crunch, clutch.Gasp, gag, grab.Suck, sting, stab.Burn, bruise, bend.Trouble, torture, tend. 3 2 1 Start again.

diagnoses

My periods started when I was nine or ten.I can’t quite remember when.They hurt me but mom saidso did hers. I was diagnosed, barely into secondary school, as clinically depressed –a diagnosis which I have carried on my shoulders ever since.But I am still here, so I guess it didn’t win yet. I was diagnosed,…

Scorched & Scorned

Abolish my lungs and then send me to sleep.  You can do what you want. I won’t feel a thing. Grind my bones into dust and make your own bread. Take all that you can until nothing is left. My mind is a heaven only I see. My soul aches to fly and to be…

On Sundays, I drown a little more

Tears prick my eyes.I gulp as though I’m taking on water.I shiver as if winter still lingers in this April spring.I cannot comprehend life, nor what it is supposed to mean. In our younger days, we were made promises;false and fanciful.You could grow up and do whatever you wanted.The world was your oyster and it…

phoenix

I watch the ink sink as my mind betrays my pen again and begins to overthink. I wanted something concrete. Something profound.Something tangible. Something significant.Something proving the potential of a mere flicker of actual talent.Instead, all I can feel are all of the little things, and the big things, gnawing away at me. Medication sweeps…

I am 1 in 10

You will have noticed that some of my work has been geared towards the trials and tribulations of suffering from Endometriosis, a condition which I officially became diagnosed with at the age of 30 following a laparoscopy in November 2021. My troubles started with the onset of puberty at the early age of 9. It…

Rant

I’m sick of this.I’m sick of the pain.I’m sick of the meds.I’m sick of how difficult it is to force myself out of bed.I’m sick of the side effects.I’m sick of the tears I shed in the bathroom on my own.I’m sick of body screaming when I try and walk home.I’m sick of my body….

The buzz in my ears

My life is nothing but a comedy,except there’s no punchline.Everyone is awful these days.I’m tired of pretending. They think that we’ll just sit there and take it,that we won’t go werewolf and go wild. I just don’t want to feel so bad anymore. The worst part about having a mental illness is people expect you…

Dance of the Macabre

All of you, the system that knows so much,forgive my laughter, I have a condition. “You have a problem.”“I have some bad news for you.” Okay?Who do I talk to?Rage. Nicotine. Stretch. Limber up. The show is yours.Soliloquy in motion.Bombed in the spotlight.Choked. People are starting to noticeall I have are negative thoughts. Ashtray. Spirals….